I've wondered recently whether my outlook hasn't reached a ridiculous level of pessimism. I can't really see good in anything. I know depression can inspire an inaccurate view of one's self and the world, and in some cases can even lead to delusion. What worries me the most is that I often feel convinced that the way I see things is the absolute most correct way, and basically everyone else is deluded. Not usually a good sign of mental stability or objectivity...
Am I just a few bad days away from disconnecting with reality? Will I snap one day and just go out and set fire to things?
A part of me is perversely delighted to know that I'm basically perfect supervillain material. I'm smart, creative, technical, nihilistic, unstable, and sometimes wish I could destroy the whole world. I'm a menace just waiting to happen!
I don't think I'm off my rocker yet, but sometimes it seems like I can feel my mind being bent by the constant pressure of my desperate dissatisfaction, boredom, and self-loathing.